All I Needed to Know I Learned in Kindergarten

So what is up that my five-year-old niece, Brooklyn is fighting off the boys? I'll admit that I have taught her the value of "sparkly make-up" and good lip gloss, but it was she who pointed out at the bra shop I unwittingly dragged her to one day, that I "should totally buy" the pink and black lacy underwear and bra set because "they are so cute!" (I was only looking at the boring white bras, btw.) And about two years ago I got a call from my sister telling me I wasn't allowed to kiss my boyfriends in front of her children because Brooklyn was making weird faces one day and told her mom when she asked what she was doing that, "I'm kissing my boyfriend the way Patti kisses [her boyfriend.]" Oooooops! I didn't ever know she was watching.

So I think her parents might have their hands full when she is a teenager. Heck, they have their hands full with her now! This point was proven by the following note she received the other day from a boy in her kindergarten class:

To Brooklyn
Brooklyn why are you in love with Ethan? Brooklyn I want to have a playdate with you at my house. Are you in love with me? Mrs. Roberts is her last name. Tiffany is her first name. I liked your hair on September 22, 2008. How do you feel about being in school? You did not stare at Ethan at school the whole time you stared at me the whole time.

Love,
Tyler

It would sure be nice if full-grown men were that honest and direct. By the way, Mrs. Roberts is her teacher and she said her "boyfriend" is neither Ethan or Tyler but Jess (or was it Justin? I can't keep track.) All I can say is that I apologize to her parents for ever kissing a boy in front of her and for getting her hooked on lip gloss. (It seemed innocent enough at the time.) And furthermore, they should be more worried about her teaching me a thing a two. Because apparently she's learned a lot more about wooing boys at five than I have at 33. Yeah, uh, good luck with that Andrea and Ryan. Hahahahahahaha!