This one comes from my very first day as a flight attendant. (By the way, I don’t think I’m a princess, but a lot of these other chicks sure think they are!)
She was a seemingly classy and polished flight attendant in her 40’s who was working in the back of the “Mad Dog” with me. (That would be an MD-88 aircraft.) All was going relatively well. As we set up the galley for snacks we made small talk. She asked if I was married (as if that somehow identifies people) and then she proceeded to tell me how that weekend she was “contemplating” 5 marriage proposals. Yes, five. Then she started going on about them, the pros and cons… mostly pastor/religious status and how well they could each take care of here (a.k.a. money.) Giving her the benefit of the doubt, I thought, hey, she’s an attractive lady, maybe she just knows how to work a room.
Later, once we had landed, I was happily saying goodbye to the passengers when I noticed her glaring at me, interphone (plane phone) in hand. Oooops! I realized I had forgotten to disarm my door (which means disable the emergency slide so it doesn’t accidentally deploy and hurt someone—a necessary step before any of the doors can be opened.) I took care of it and responded on my phone to the head FA that it was done. Everyone was all panicky because I guess they thought there was some sort of problem. So “Bernice” comes up and starts telling me how I am going to lose my job because I forgot that step. I believed her and started to cry. I told her I didn’t hear the announcement because my ears were all plugged up from flying and the PA system on those planes is barely audible. After I had calmed down and been assured by the Flight Leader “Susan” that I would not be losing my job, I was told that really, Bernice should have just taken care of my door or come and got me rather than sit and stare at me. Besides, we are supposed to check each other’s doors. Weirdo lady.
But it gets better. On the next leg of our flight, she brought it up again and I said I just hadn’t heard the announcement about preparing my door for arrival. So she immediately closed her eyes, folded her arms, and stepped close enough to touch my arm with her hand. Then her eyelids started doing some strange fluttering thing—like a kid pretending to be asleep, only way more spastic. Then she opened her eyes and informed me that she had just prayed that God would open up my ears… like she had done me some great act of healing.
But it gets better still! Once we got to our hotel in Richmond, she saw a sign announcing a wedding being held at the hotel that evening. While Susan and I made plans to go to dinner, Bernice said she wouldn’t be joining us because she was going to attend the wedding. “Seriously?” I asked. “Did you even bring something to wear?” asked Susan. “Oh, I’ll just wear my uniform suit,” to which I responded (while managing to keep my jaw from dropping), “So you’re going to crash a wedding in your uniform?!?” Bernice answered, “Oh yes. I have a way with people, they won’t mind. I just need to keep my mind focused and this will help me make my decision,” (about which proposal to accept.) ***People, I am NOT making this up.*** It turns out she overslept and “missed” the wedding, but STIIIIL!
And the cherry on top… The next day we were preparing the carts for the snack and beverage service. She had put the napkins in their little spot and I turned them upside so the fold was up. I didn’t learn this in training, but it doesn’t take a genius to realize that if the edges are up, every time you pull a napkin up, it comes unfolded. And when you hand out 100 of them, it ends up taking a lot of extra time to fold them all back together before graciously handing it to the guest with their beverage. (I tell you, it’s an art form, lol!) Anyway, so I thought it would make us more efficient if I turned them around. I just figured she had put them in there haphazardly and it was no big deal. But OH!… Apparently it WAS a big deal. She didn’t waste a second telling me, “It’s no wonder you’re not married. You’re such a control freak.” And she was dead serious. Not only did I think to myself, “Well not everyone can have 5 proposals to choose from!” but I also thought with horror, “Welcome to your new job!”
5 comments:
WOW, and this is who you rely on in the"unlikely event of an emergency" to save your life?!? Sounds like some things never change at the Delta:-))
Patti... I just love you! That is a great story! People are freaks!
I can understand those old ladies we've got..you're a lot nicer than me. I would of said/did something that made them think twice about doing that again. Like personally introduce them to the entire plane.. which I've done several times. Hey that is what PA's are for. :)
At least with the look you remembered what you were to do and got it done. That is all that matters. Love the pic of you- so classy, wish I was with you in the air.
There are a lot of great flight attendants out there (I am sure Patti is one of them) but some of these crabby old birds need to hang it up. Seriously! Hang in there Patti. :)
By the way, "Bernice" was a brand new flight attendant like me, even though she was older. She was just cuckoo! That was my very first flight, almost six months ago. But I really love my job. It's cool that I actually get paid for it. :) Most of the people I work with are great, it's just fun to laugh about the ones that aren't. ...WOW, Dave, I didn't know you were a reader. Thanks for your comment. Stop by more often! ;)
Post a Comment